Triggers
Triggers are the moments I have of being completely uncomfortable. Situations with the one I love and for some unknown reason I am not comfortable. Something happened in the past and at that moment it brings me back to feeling how it was when I was molested. At times I remember what was done to me, but other times I have no clue and can not figure it out. When these moments come over me, I’m transformed back in to that little girl that is very intimated and naive. Sometimes it is hard to tell my loved one why I feel uncomfortable. Then again, at times I have no clue why. These moments are usually those times when a man and women are at their most intimate. Sharing that closeness with the one I love. My molester robbed me of most of those moments. DAMMIT! Just this anger – that these precious moments were taken from me. How the hell can someone be such an arrogant, selfish, perverted, sicko! You know what hurts even more, that he doesn’t even care how much he has hurt me, scared me, and robbed me! He took so much from me that I have to work and struggle so hard to get some since of the ‘true’ me back. That’s ok because I am working through it and I know I AM a BETTER PERSON then he.
